Volume 1

The family oracle of health, economy, medicine, and good living adapted to all ranks of society, from the palace to the cottage / By F. Crell ... and W. M. Wallace, Esq., assisted by a Committee of scientific gentlemen.

  • Crell, A. F.
Date:
1824-1827
Catalogue details

Licence: Public Domain Mark

Credit: The family oracle of health, economy, medicine, and good living adapted to all ranks of society, from the palace to the cottage / By F. Crell ... and W. M. Wallace, Esq., assisted by a Committee of scientific gentlemen. Source: Wellcome Collection.

Provider: This material has been provided by The University of Glasgow Library. The original may be consulted at The University of Glasgow Library.

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    “ It was but a small affair for him to have studied in thirty- two universities, and to have travelled over sixty-five kingdoms, where he has consulted the sorcerers of the Mogul and the Sa- mojed magicians. He has made other voyages round the world, to peruse the great book of nature, from the ice of the north even to the austral pole, and the burning deserts of the torrid zone. He has traversed the two hemispheres, and sojourned ten years in Asia, with the Saltimbanque Indians, who taught him the art of stilling tempests, and of saving himself from ship- wreck, by gliding over the surface of the sea on elastic sabots. “ He brings from Tonquin and Cochin-China, talismans, and constellated mirrors, whence he can recognise thieves and fore- see the future. He can lull asleep vampires, command hob- goblins, arrest spirits, and conjure all nocturnal spectres. “ He has learned among the Tartars of Thibet the secret of their great Dalai-Lama, which renders him immortal, not like Voltaire and Montgolfier, by the productions of genius, but in buying in Sweden the elixir of long life; at Strasburg, the powder of Cagliostro; at Hamburg, the portable gold of the great Adolphus Saint Germain ; and at Stuttgard, the crutch of P. Barnabas, and the walking-stick of the wandering Jew, when he saw these two old men pass into the capital of Wurtemberg, the 11th of May, 16'84. “ In making use of the ointment which the witch Canidia employed in preparing for the infernal orgies, he proves by multiplied experiments that a man can enter into the neck of a bottle, if it be sufficiently large. “ He advertises, besides, that he continues to cure the tooth- ache, not like empirics, in breaking the jaw, but by a method as certain, and hitherto unheard of, which consists in cutting off the head; and to prove that this operation is not dangerous, and that it can, by the rules of art, be performed, cito, tutk, et jucundb [i. e. quickly, safely, and pleasantly]—he will behead many animals, and resuscitate them in a moment afterwards, according to the principles of P. Kircher, by Palingenesia. “ He is so strongly persuaded of the efficacy of his remedies for toothache, and for all diseases curable and incurable, that he fears not to promise an extraordinary sum to all patients, who, three months after the treatment, shall be in a state to complain. “ He sells, for ten guineas, the eyes of the weasel, enchased according to art in rings of semi-gold. It is well known, from Galen, Pliny, and Paracelsus, that this is a sovereign remedy against the Aiguilette :— “ Si tu veux promptement denouer l’aiguillette, “ Porte a ton petit doigt l’ceil droit d’une beletlc.” and so ends this singular farrago of absurdity.