Cope's mixture : selected from his Tobacco Plant.

  • Cope's (Firm)
Date:
1893
Catalogue details

Licence: Public Domain Mark

Credit: Cope's mixture : selected from his Tobacco Plant. Source: Wellcome Collection.

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    “An Unpleasant Discovery. “Dr. Trail, of Philadelphia, has made a very un¬ pleasant discovery. In about seven years, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune will approach nearer the earth than they have been in eighteen hundred years, and the result will be a pestilence. When Congress has the manliness to make astronomy an indictable offence, then we shall have relief from these things, but not before. It was not along while since that some one predicted that the earth would be swamped with a deluge, and you couldn’t borrow an umbrella or a pair of rubbers from any one. The next idiot said a comet would strike and demolish the earth in a twinkling. Whereupon many excellent people tied their beds and carpets about their premises, and put cotton in their ears, and sat down on the cellar bottom in dreadful expectation of the shock. Hardly had this alarm passed off when another astronomer came around telling people that the Niagara Falls would be dry in less than nineteen thousand years, and nothing would do but that people should hurry right out there for a farewell look, and in less than twenty-four hours there wasn’t people enough in Danbury to entertain a Japanese hermit. And now here is Trail with four planets and no vaccine matter. All the Tobacco-chewers are to be killed by these planets, and young ladies who wear stays, and men who bet on the wrong horse. If we understand the old scoundrel correctly, the only people saved are those wTho drink lemonade out of a dipper and play Copenhagen with their aunts.” fMr. Bailey is impressed with the dangers atten¬ dant upon the practice of tampering with Tobacco—either your own, or that which be¬ longs to others. He gives two instances, “An Elm Street boy smoked his first pipe on Saturday, and came home very sick. He didn’t know what was the matter with him, but his mother did. She gave him two quarts of bone-set tea and put a quarter-yard of plaster on his breast, and some mustard drafts on his feet. Then she put him to bed, and darkened the room, and fed him on a new kind of balsam till Monday morning, when she allowed she had got the best of that typhus attack.” “A Main Street boy, who was told he should try to cheer the aged, tried ‘three times three and a tiger,’ on his grandmother, Christmas morning, and the old lady was so startled that she spilled a box full of snuff on him. He looks upon the beauties of nature with his left eye now.”